At Christmastime, I helped organize a massive donation to our local battered women’s shelter, a food drive for the food bank, and our company donated personal care items to all the nursing homes in the city. Helping deliver a few thousand dollars worth of shampoo and food and an immeasurable amount of relief helped remind me that my life, while boring and fairly ordinary, is extremely comfortable. As a way to remind myself more often (and, of course, to teach Malia what it means to be kind and thoughtful), I’ve decided to make monthly donations of paper goods to the women’s, homeless, and children’s shelters in town–items that each organization tells me they run consistently low on (or out of). Will a few dollars worth of toilet paper change my life? Probably not. Will it help someone else find life more bearable? I can only hope so.
"The greatest book of all time," according to one biased reviewer.
I strenuously urge you all to find a way to be more charitable this year, even if it’s just by refraining from being a jerk a few hours a day. Hopefully, you guys choose to do more than just the bare minimum (insert “pieces of flair” joke) and do something meaningful with your time and available resources. Unless you’re really a jerk, in which case I urge you to stay away from me.
In keeping with the year of giving theme, and somewhat in keeping with the gift of paper theme, as well, I’m giving away three copies of my friend D. B. Grady’s book, Red Planet Noir. It’s the exact opposite of toilet paper–you’ll never want to get rid of it, even after it’s obviously been used. I read it over this weekend* and I have to tell you that, in my completely unbiased opinion, this book kicks ass. In my very biased, my-friend-wrote-the-book opinion, this is the greatest book of all time.
You don’t have to do much to win, either. After all, giving isn’t really about getting, so I can’t ask you for much. First, I want you to click this link. Then, I want you to tell me what you’d give for a free copy. This is hypothetical, of course–if you actually had to give something, you would just buy one, right? It’s kinda like the “what would you do for a Klondike bar?” campaign, only smaller and less catchy, but equally open to crude humor and “your mom” jokes.
Aaaaand, GO!
I would give at least one limb. Maybe two, provided I was still capable of turning pages.
That’s awesome that you helped so many people, Definitely inspiring..
I need to be more giving this year as well, It’s such a nice feeling know that someone is more comfortable due to something that I did.
Thanks for reminding me of the great feeling one gets from helping others.
As for the freebie book, I really have nothing witty and/or clever to say so um… I’ll give you a nickel? OR one of those pennies that you pay 50 cents for to get a design printed on to it.
BAHAHA “Reading is for winners”
Know what? I’d teach someone how to read.
It’s good to see you around Crezonator!
It’s a good feeling to help out in the community. For the past two years I’ve helped organize and get donations for a local diabetes walk-a-thon.
I’ve been looking for Grady’s book in Borders, Hastings AND B&N. I haven’t wanted to buy it off of Amazon. Every book I’ve ever gotten off of Amazon has showed up in my box badly beaten. Apparently no one knows how to use a bubble mailer. *sigh*
Miss you!
I would totally give a limb, too. Or a baby. My firstborn (not to be expected soon), or spin some straw into gold? Damn, woman, what do you WANT?
Since this is hyothetical (right??) I’m going to say I’d give a Klondike Bar, an arm, someone elses baby, and teach a man to fish for a copy of your friends book. For two copies I will do the windows too.
How about a 1998 cache high yearbook that adrienne lorentino went through and wrote comments about everyone lmao!!!
You guys have the best suggestions. Contest closes this weekend, so now you guys get to try and one-up each other. I’ll stand back.
I like sci-fi.
I like detective novels.
I like reading.
Huh…I’d probably like to read this sci-fi detective novel. Weird.
i’d give you the chance to entertain my son with a new and different book to read. afterall, that is why i’m writing this: the chance to put that special gleam in a young boys heart and mind. you do want to do that, don’t you? i mean, you’re not the kind of heartless criminal that goes around making meaningless offers of freebies and special give-aways? that’s harsh! and i’d hate to say bad things about a person i don’t even know.
well, have a great weekend. and whatever you do, make the right decision.
This is my favorite book of all time. I encourage those of you who lose to buy multiple copies as a consolation.
I’d give the greatest gift of all……a copy of DB Grady’s Red Planet Noir!
Only because I already have my own copy and having a second copy when there are others out there without one to call their own would seem ridiculously flamboyant.
I’d give –
Used Parachute. Never opened. Small stain.
A cookie to the mouse of your choosing.
A muffin to the moose of your choosing.
A pancake to the pig of your choosing.
The use of 3 evil minions.
A Space Monkey. Let’s call him X.
A drawing of a robot.
There. I think that’s it.