Posts Tagged ‘writing

09
Mar
10

Books I Love: Bird by Bird †

One day, I woke up and decided that I was going to be a writer if it killed me. And sometimes, very nearly, it has, at least in the emotional sense. It’s hard to write, to throw your insides all over something permanent and then release that something all alone into the Multiverse with no parental supervision. It’s hard to wake up and do all the things you have to do (things that make you a “grown-up,” usually, and are fraught with unfun-ness), then convince yourself that it’s worth it to try and continue something that most people consider worthless, lazy, or selfish—especially if those are issues you have trouble reconciling in yourself, which any good self-loathing writer does. Writing in seriousness is brave, and generally, I am not. Whatever possessed me that day, and for the majority of the days since, clearly had no idea what a chicken it decided to inhabit.

The best book I’ve read thus far on the topic of a writer’s competing grandiosity and low self-esteem is Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life. I reread it recently, and the book seems to ring ever truer with age. Lamott’s dark and twisty sense of humor is something I can easily relate to, and entire passages seem to be literal transcriptions from my mornings:

“Often when you sit down to write… your mental illnesses arrive at the desk like your sickest, most secretive relatives. And they pull up chairs in a semicircle around the computer, and they try to be quiet but you know they are there with their weird coppery breath, leering at you behind your back.”

I’ve wasted a lot of time hem-hawing, doodling, plotting ways to get rich but not plotting books, not being funny on Twitter, trying to figure out how to spell words I made up, and staring at the ceiling, and crying into my coffee, and digging for the end of a bottomless bag of salt and vinegar chips, and starting then stopping then starting then trying to quit and being told that I am not allowed. (Thankfully, people never allow me to quit, knowing [somehow] that I will do whatever they say is necessary. I love and hate these people in varying degrees—depending on the day, the task and whether or not I actually wanted to quit.)

Bird by Bird is less of a technique guide than a typical “writing book,” instead relying on the author’s extreme likability and honest voice to persuade the reader to actually sit down and put something on paper. It’s good to get permission from people with experience, especially when suffering the wavering self-assuredness specific to writing. Stephen King tells us in On Writing that we may write anything we want—anything! Likewise, Lamott has an entire chapter (hilariously-but-aptly) titled “Shitty First Drafts,” which extends us the freedom to make terrible, heinous, seriously grievous, heartbreaking errors with wanton abandon, to write down everything that floats across the conscious parts of the brain, even if those things are nonsensical and trite, unrelated, full of adverbs and split infinitives or beginning in conjunctions, or part of another story, or a retelling of a day in the life of your toaster, because eventually what happens is that you find the thing you’re really writing about buried underneath all the junk that fell out of your brain and onto the page. That’s a rule I can follow, and since I’ve started doing exactly that, my life has been somewhat less desperate and noticeably uninhabited by coppery-breathed mental illnesses.

Other chapters cover useful topics like jealousy and broccoli, which are things even non-writers might benefit from reading.

Bird by Bird was recommended to me by Caleb Krause, way back when MySpace was all the rage, and I’ll never really be able to thank him for mentioning it in passing and then forgetting all about it. It’s been really useful, more than most books, and I love it.

Actually, I can: Thanks, Caleb, for recommending this book in passing then forgetting about it. It’s been really useful, more than most books, and I love it.

24
Jan
10

NaNoRevisMo, or How Adrienne got her groove back.

I’m working on my NaNoWriMo novel again. After the first couple of chapters, I ditched the plot and went headfirst into this weird stream-of-consciousness, getting-1,667-words-a-day mentality, and all was lost. Well, not lost so much as avoided for easier, ultimately less satisfying things, like getting 1,667 words a day. I’m never doing NaNoWriMo again (says the girl who, in November, will be thinking about doing exactly that).

Anyway, I’ve found myself coming back to the manuscript over the last few weeks, trying to salvage parts that work and coming up with new plot points and dialogue, which is all good news. This is how these things work, people. Trust me, I know everything about how to write a really great–ok, I have no idea. I hope it doesn’t suck too bad to sell as a free digital download. That’s the best I’ll let myself hope for at this very early date. If you’re having a hard time remembering, or if, perhaps, you never knew what the book is about, this is the brief/vague/possibly inaccurate synopsis from my NaNoWriMo account:

eBay reselling, lobster emancipation, flea market discoveries, effeminate clergymen, grand theft auto, match.com, environmental awareness, pediatric psychiatry, trans-fat disclosure, sex!

Also, a touching story of a guy and a girl and life, the universe, and everything.

01
Dec
09

Things and stuff.

So, check this out:

I did it. Or something. Woot!

It’s terrible, terrible, terrible. I don’t mean in an “Oh, don’t read that garbage!”-modest kind of way, or a campy kind of way, or a Chuck Palahniuk kind of way. I mean it’s awful, in an awful kind of way. The first twelve pages are reworkable and the following couple chapters are editable, but after that? If I let it escape the folder on my desktop (the one with the sad hobo clown on it), people would think I’d hired a (blind, untrained, drunk) monkey to hammer out the last 30,000 words. And they would be partially right. I mean, I wasn’t always drunk and I’m not entirely blind, but it is the first time I’ve tried to extend a story into more than twenty pages, and you know I’m a beauty school drop-out, so you could say I’m as untrained as anyone else. Anyway, it was hard, and a lot of times it was unfun in the hardest, unfunnest way, and there were times in November when I was very intoxicated and wished I’d never announced that I had tried to do it. I’m glad I did, but man, this “book” sucks. I’ll start over from chapter two and make it work, starting sometime in… I don’t know.

I’ve been working pretty much non-stop since I told I would be, which was a few weeks ago. All of my projects (of which there are always too many) have hit a wall in my efforts to sleep, feed the kid, and shower between 11-hour stretches at my desk. I’d like to be bitchy about it, but to be honest it’s way easier to get work done after hours and there’s plenty that still needs doing. Also, I like being able to pay my bills and buy the kid shoes without weeping over my terminally-ill bank account. So, I leave work in the dark and my mom who does too much already makes sure no vagrant wanderers steal my kiddo before we can haggle a good price out of them. You’d think a sack of rice and a mattress spring was a decent price, but damn if they didn’t turn me down. [insert joke about the economy here]

Oh! And before I forget: There’s a giveaway coming up, as soon as the prizes get here. I’ll talk to you guys about that then.

Have a decent week. And please, hold your applause. This is embarrassing. No, really. Gosh.

12
Nov
09

Wait –

I just syndicated my column and got published in a lit mag and I’m writing a book.

I need a PARADE.

12
Nov
09

Fatiguery.

I’m supposed to be writing for NaNoWriMo. Obviously, I’m not.

That means I should be writing brochure copy or white sheets. Obviously, I’m not.

These things mean I should be querying magazines to reprint my column, or working on a short story to submit to literary magazines, or writing future articles for that column I’m trying to sell everyone. Obviously, I’m not.

What I am doing is decompressing. We’ve been working crazy hours, I’ve been writing every day and sleeping almost never, and I’ve had to shuffle and rearrange my projects so often that I really don’t know what I should be working on. I’m just so tired. I’ve reached a level of fatigue that feels like coming up for air to find that there’s no air, and instead of air there’s only peanut butter. It’s weird and sluggish and doesn’t really give you room to breathe, and it’s so easy to sink back under and take a nap for a month or so when the world gets that thick and heavy. I don’t want to do that, though, because the longer you stay down, the harder it is to get back out, and I kind of have stuff to do, y’know? I mean, I like peanut butter, but damn.

The good news is that out of endless activity comes a steady stream of results.

1. I sold the column to a couple of magazines this week. I’m still querying, still talking to other publications, still keeping a small section of my brain focused on making that work out for me.

2. A new literary magazine I submitted a piece to is officially on sale today. Leaves & Flowers is a literary journal, wherein each piece of nonfiction, fiction, poetry or artwork follows a single prompt. I’m especially excited about this one because it marks the first time I have participated in a project that was conceived and executed by people I only know via the Internet. My friends Caleb Krause and Alicia Lara are both published in this issue (the first), and the journal is edited and published by Bailey Shoemaker Richards. Purchasing yourself a copy is a good way to ensure that there’s a next copy to purchase and that people like me and Ali and Caleb and Bailey have a place to share our work. Because  that’s all any of us really wants.

3. I have a super-awesome giveaway coming up on my site. It involves a writer friend, some autographs, and a few copies of said writer-friend’s (unbelievably entertaining) new book. Stay tuned for that.

4. I’m still in love with my book. I have changed the focus of the story dramatically from when I began working on it, and I feel more comfortable and more satisfied with the idea as a whole. And even though I’m having some sort of weird remorse (and general anxiety about sharing any fiction, since we’re being honest), I refuse to remove any post, including that one. The thing about the Internet is that it is simultaneously more and less permanent than actual life, and people treat this place like some kind of make-believe world where you can do or say whatever you want without consequence. In real life, you can’t take back the things you say. You put your words out there, and even if you spend the rest of forever trying, you can’t claw them back into your mouth and pretend they never existed. The same should go for words you put online; so, even if you’re immobilized with embarrassment over something (say, for instance, a few paragraphs from a book you’re working on) or if you think you’re the baddest mofo who ever graced the innerwebz like that time your stuff was on CNN), you should still have to own all of it. Therefore, the posts all stay, and I try not to think about it.

And that really turned into something unexpected.

I need a nap. And a sandwich.




† Auto-Post Disclaimer

† This symbol denotes that an item was written sometime in the past and scheduled to post at a predetermined point in the future. Updates at the time of publication (including but not limited to those for Yahoo!, Twitter and Facebook) may appear when I am at my desk at work, working busily on work things with coworkers and filing TPS reports with the new cover sheet. Additionally, updates may appear while I am napping on Saturday afternoon, or on an airplane with no wi-fi, or in line at WalMart taking cellphone shots for seedy niche blogs. In short, the Internet is a time-traveler and I am not, therefore I will appear to be in this place when I am actually in that place, doing whatever I am currently doing.

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